Backseat Drivers

Why is it that mothers are always backseat drivers? I mean, she was literally restraining herself from crawling into my seat and taking the wheel from me.

We were driving along in our brilliantly blue PT Cruiser rental and I was doing 80 (the speed limit was 70). She told me to "SLOW DOWN". I'm like...I'm not doing THAT much over the speed limit (Everyone knows that the speed limit is just a suggestion and you're supposed to do at least 5 MPH over the speed limit!)

Then she said I was driving too fast for this little car. I just gaped at her and then finally gathered my wits and said, "If 80 MPH was too fast for this car, they wouldn't have put 120 on the speedometer." At this, she said, "I don't care, slow down." So I didn't have any choice except to slow down.

Mothers.

She was snoozing in the seat next to me and every time (I mean, EVERY TIME) she woke up, she'd make a comment, and then go back to sleep.

"You're too close to that truck."

"Slow down, you're going too fast."

"Stay in the middle lane if you're not going to pass anyone."

At this point, I just yelled at her to leave me alone.

At the next restroom stop, when I came back from the bathroom, she was sitting resolutely in the driver seat. And then she proceeded to drive at 65 MPH for the rest of the trip.

There you have it, my mother! I love her anyway :)

Oh yes, and the question of the year.

"Why does the 'expected arrival time' on the GPS keep increasing? It was 4:17 and now it's 4:24...does that mean I'm driving too slow?"

um. YES!